Category Archives: Infertility

The End of Pregnancy, Birth & Baby!

Ya’ll, life has been a whirlwind. My last update here was when I was 32 weeks pregnant. I felt pretty good, but that changed pretty quickly.

To follow along with my life in real time (or closer to it), be sure you’re following me on Instagram @findinglifessilversun.

We went on our babymoon summer 2021. Both of us were fully vaccinated, and covid cases were extremely low, so we chose a not-super-popular destination. We went to the Black Hills in South Dakota, but not to Mount Rushmore. I was 35 weeks pregnant.

We live close enough that we made it a road trip, and we stopped at my mother-in-law’s house in Wyoming for a couple days on the way north. Packing up the day before and loading the car before we left, I wasn’t feeling great. I assumed it was just because I was massively pregnant and overdoing it. But I didn’t start feeling better at any point on the almost 5 hour drive to my MIL’s house. Actually, after about 4 hours, I started feeling pretty rotten.

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32 Week Appointment and Growth Scan

I didn’t write a second trimester update, as I actually felt fantastic. My energy took a while to come back after the first trimester, and it never hit “pre pregnancy baseline,” but all the other symptoms of the first trimester faded away. I got to experience life as a “normal” person, with a normal body, having a normal pregnancy. Honestly, I haven’t felt that healthy in years!

At 23 weeks, we got to have our anatomy scan, which is an hour long ultrasound where they check out every part of baby to make sure everything is growing and forming as it should. Bee is totally perfect! During the anatomy scan, we noticed the umbilical cord was inserting in the side of the placenta instead of in the middle, so I was scheduled to come back at 32 weeks for a growth scan. Sometimes, when the cord inserts in the side, it can get kinked or compressed and inhibit baby’s growth, so we wanted to make sure Bee stayed on track.

Profile picture from the anatomy scan!
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Chronic Illness Pregnancy: First Trimester

After three years, three months, and eight days of waiting, hoping, and praying… WE GOT OUR FIRST POSITIVE PREGNANCY TEST! Somehow, in all that time, we’d never gotten a positive. To learn more about what it took us to get to this point, check out the “Infertility” category on my blog, and read my previous post about our InvoCell/IUI cycle. While we were obviously quite happy, infertility robs you of the blissful ignorance many first time parents get to enjoy at the beginning of their pregnancy. Even if you haven’t ever personally experienced loss, you become acutely aware of when and how everything can go horribly wrong. Infertility is also extremely traumatic, and that trauma can cause you to subconsciously protect yourself by disconnecting you from the experience.

This post has taken me quite a while to write, because I was extremely dissociated from my pregnancy until very recently (I am 22 weeks pregnant while writing this). It felt like I was watching a very detailed vlog of someone else’s pregnancy, not that everything was happening to me. It’s a very weird thing to explain, but the people who have had the misfortune of dealing with infertility all have seemed to understand exactly what I’m talking about. It’s like a constant “when is this all going to go wrong” sensation, mixed with a lucid dream.

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InvoCell, IUI #7, and Results

Last time I wrote, we were just about to start InvoCell. As is usual for life, especially mine, things didn’t go quite as we planned, so let’s get caught up.

In “InvoCell Full Steam Ahead,” I talk in more detail about the tests that were required before we moved on to the actual InvoCell process, and the results of those tests. I’ll do a brief overview again, as a refresher, but please read the previous post for the details! Since we were at a new clinic for InvoCell (only one clinic in Colorado does the procedure), and since it had been almost a year since we’d last done any treatments, we had to do a bunch of testing before starting the stimulation medications. It was a little frustrating, but after we got the results, I was very grateful to have done them!

Waiting to have my SIS & TET performed
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InvoCell: Full Steam Ahead

When things happen in the infertility world, they tend to happen all at once or very slowly, with almost no in-between at all. Right now, we’re in the “happen all at once” area, after a whole lot of “nothing going on.” All the way back in November 2019, we stopped treatments due to other health issues deciding they needed priority. We never did figure out what those other health issues were caused by, but they resolved themselves enough that I could live life again. In July 2020, we decided we were ready to move forward with fertility treatments, and had decided to pursue InvoCell. Unfortunately, InvoCell required us to leave the clinic we absolutely love for a different clinic in Colorado.

Graphic showing InvoCell culture device and retention device.
InvoCell Device, from InvoCell’s Website

We had our initial consult with the new clinic on August 5th. Initial impressions weren’t fantastic, but I understand the doctor’s personality better now and while she’s not warm and fuzzy, she’s nice and understanding and knowledgeable. They’re our only option for InvoCell in the state of Colorado, and I trust them to do it!

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Infertility in 2020 and Next Steps

I haven’t written about infertility, in detail, on my blog since I did my “catch up” posts in February 2019 (one, two, three). I did do a quick summary of 2019 in these two posts (one, two), which includes a quick rundown of when we did what in regards to infertility, as well as what else happened in our life that year.

In 2019, we started fertility treatments with a clinic we really love. It’s a small, two doctor clinic, and it feels very welcoming and loving. Based on all of the tests, I should have conceived with the IUIs (intrauterine insemination, or artificial insemination), so we’re not sure why I have been unable to get pregnant. In 2019, we tried for 9 cycles. Those nine cycles included: three rounds of Clomid with two IUIs, three rounds of letrozole with three IUIs, two cycles cancelled before medication due to “functional cysts,” and one non-medicated cycle trying. Before 2019, we had done two unmonitored cycles with Clomid, an unmedicated IUI, and a cycle with progesterone after ovulation only. We started trying to conceive in July 2017, and I started preparing my body in 2016. It’s been a long road, and it’s not over yet.

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Let’s Catch Up: 2019 Review, part two

My first 2019 review got longer than anticipated, so I divided the year in half. Be sure to check out the first half of 2019 in this post.

Both summaries include links to my Instagram posts (where I’ve remained active) for further details, when they’re available. A few items, especially in part one, also include links to blog posts. All links below are to my own material.

Now, without further ado, let’s get to the summary! This post starts with July 2019:

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Let’s Catch Up: 2019 Review, part one

April 2019 was the last time I was consistent on my blog, and a lot has happened since then. I got burned out and overwhelmed, so I needed to take a break from blogging. My life has continued to burn me out and overwhelm me, but from a blogging perspective I’m feeling more like myself again!

To help catch everyone up on life’s happenings, I wanted to do a summary of 2019. No matter how “quick” I try to make these, they always end up long. This post will be January through June, and part two will be up next week. These summaries will include links to my Instagram posts (where I’ve remained active) for further details, when they’re available. A few items, especially earlier in 2019, will also include links to blog posts. All links in this article are to my own material.

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Our Infertility Struggle, So Far – part 3

This is part three, and the final part, of my infertility catch-up series. Part one covers the beginning of our journey, what we tried before getting the official “infertility” diagnosis, and necessary medical background to understand the process (a detailed rundown of the menstrual cycle and how conception occurs). Part two continues with our journey and catches you up with all the testing we did the last half of 2018. Part two includes doctor changes, lots of blood tests, and lots of imaging.

This part, part three, will go into the details of what the infertility testing showed and what those results mean. I also give a list of the supplements that Dan and I have both started on the advice of our fertility clinic. This supplement list is for informational purposes only, and will never include dosages. If you’re interested in the supplements, please talk to your own doctor.

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Our Infertility Struggle, So Far – part 2

This is part two of our most recent infertility update. Please make sure you read part one so that we’re all on the same page before starting this part. If, at any time, you get confused, please make sure to go back to part one before asking questions (in case I already answered them).

This infertility update is a little different from my other infertility updates. I am not as emotional this cycle, so I wanted to do a comprehensive and logistical/informational update. This post is going to be about our infertility testing and get you caught up on the events that have occurred up to this point. It is going to be long, and there will be a lot of links to previous updates and Instagram posts so that you can get more details about certain parts.

Part three, and the final part, is where I will go into detail about our testing and treatments. Once it is published, it will be linked here.

I am not a doctor. This post is not medical advice. Do not change any aspect of your healthcare, without consulting any of your medical team, due to the content of this post. If this disclaimer is ignored, I cannot be held liable for any harm you may cause yourself.

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